kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
also , very excite , start to get deeper into long story of mushroom musume . of course , short cycle story is clear enough - recluse want for daughter , witch offer up , again and again and again . but there is reason to this cycle , deep secrets to this world . just become matter of how to unlock .

kapii - weeping maroon deathcap - help jo to restore cafe up in clouds , and now work there happily with jaq . like kuna , not many chances to actually act on cruel or visceral nature , even though try hard . want to act tougher than really able to sustain .

mevina , deathly devilish bleeding tooth , climb past jo's cafe on beanstalk to reach moon for first time . can not do anything here yet , but learn of violet-eye lady , and strange palace . ( finally recognise that picture which show off behind-scenes creation for ! yay ! ) other than that , mevina take caelia to gala , because why not .

wanami , weeping red deathcap ... yes , that is 3 deathcaps now , this garden setup is extremely good at deathcaps . will have to tweak this , because also really laggy . anyway , wanami have plenty of chances to act on visceral urges , and end up with 3 desiccation traits on top of each other ! that was huge mycelium and dampness loss with every round , but fortunately garden provide lots of dampness , and recluse provide lots of mycelium , so actually survive whole game . mostly . wanami try to pick eye flower , pick fight instead , then fail to flee and fall down chasm . with only 18 mycelium left , just no way to get back out .

but before all that ...


this game is so good . need to know more immediately and consume into fibre of soul .
well , maybe not quite that dramatic , but pretty dramatic . :P

poetry ?

Jul. 4th, 2025 10:39 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
quite some time ago , kossai build tree out of trash - shitty gift paper , boxes , random scraps of trash , secrets that never want for anyone to see , all tape up and pin in place to shape tree . idea was would some day paper over , but just never manage to get around to that . so that tree stay as very visibly plastic wreck , while constantly threaten to fall apart just out of neglect and cover in layers of dust . sad , did not want to give up , but still never get around . not like need for materials - save up glue and so many papers for this ! but just never did , for some reason .

... until now , anyway . finally have enough of dance around work , especially with knowledge that lover legion work on plans to visit ( !!! ) , and yesterday commit to start process , paper whole thing over roughly . every few hours since then , kossai look around and touch up rough spots .
and realise that most of paper which use for this come from hospitalisations , both influenza this year and surgery last year . medication prescriptions , side effect pamphlets , discharge papers , wound care papers .

do feel some sort of strange poetry in that , but hard to put in words .

on silly topic ...

Jul. 4th, 2025 04:23 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
in think about mushroom musume , and various daughters that player can find : kossai not only have mushroom faeries here , but also happen to have ... potato faerie .
mushroom musume in real life is right here ~ ( joke )

actually kind of silly sometimes that character writing is very sapphic , when eira very much gay man and that tend to dominate front expression . really appreciate attention to detail , just not evoke affections in same way , hehe . so lovely how some daughters immortalise through world , though - nemuri's cavern , meloi mccoolname , how jaq and kapii work together at jo's cafe ...

... hmm , nemuri specifically lose humanity . wonder if nemuri's cavern would be not just name anymore , but literally where nemuri eventually live out life .

really want to buy house in mushroom village at some point , just need to figure out how to reliably get money . even pickpocket kuna only end up with 5 out of 10 necessary coins . ( yeah , cheap digs ! still not cheap enough . )

suppression and journeys

Jul. 4th, 2025 10:37 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai

crosspost from tumblr .
kossai grow up with paganism - sort of eclectic mix of things . learn about faeries and changelings , past lives , magic , and overall delve into culture and ideas that christians try to kill . still , that did not mean faeriehood come with one nice and easy path to follow .

under cut for length . not just about physical nonhumanity , but expect experiences will be particularly familiar there .


mushroom musume ~ fufu & kuna

Jul. 2nd, 2025 10:09 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
fufu - volatile purple fairy ring . several things compound here and so think did not really get to see effects of all - for example , fufu grow up with 0 affection , but think override by faerie gamble . also end up with debt to witch due to recluse die off-screen somewhere , so despite likelihood would open up great mountain aspiration , instead choose to do some dirty work for witch ... then turn tail and refuse , which end in certain death . witch is just jealous mushrooms can make friends >_>

kuna - assertive black deathcap . maximum affection for kuna ! between both garden setup and event choices , end up with really strong dampness , potency , and humanity all at once . kind of funny combination for girl who feel deep , visceral urges to kill - funnily never run into any events that would allow kuna to kill , so really just play as ... helpful thief ? kuna did of course meet mr newyear , and that is where ...



this world is so fun to play around in . same things happen over and over again , but others happen dynamically , change as each daughter add on . wonder about lore reasons for that ? try not to look at spoilers too much in all honesty , but know there is some really cool stuff ahead , which not really sure how to get to yet . part of why go through whole journey to record as much as possible !

mushroom musume ~ hello ???

Jul. 2nd, 2025 09:30 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
in middle of play right now , and see thing is , usually when winter come , will get choice of aspiration . now , this daughter did open up 3 different ones , so think - wow , how will kossai choose ?

evidently : game choose ! did not get any choice of where to go , or what aspiration to choose , just force down forest path and suddenly - " cross the bridge " all over screen . so holy shit , OK ! guess jo's cafe and thief will have to wait for future daughters !

silly thoughts

Jul. 2nd, 2025 05:46 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
if kossai was in mushroom musume ...
pixie's parasol , but with fun wings . because ... because . :P

base traits : slime form , incompetent
additionally : bookworm

dampness : mid range
mycelium : high range
robustness : low range
potency : mid range
humanity : variable day by day

would hang out in mushroom village lots , but maybe explore human settlements and bring back some totally not stolen trinkets :D

ugh , ugh !

Jul. 1st, 2025 04:23 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
want to draw for artfight , but showers always drain energy so now have nothing left to draw with , and everything that try to draw just drive to frustration .
but ... so many fun sheogoraths to draw ! and faeries ! aghh !
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
crosspost from tumblr . ( original post )

preface

want to make clear that none of this post is to say that any variation or trait is inherently nonhuman regardless of circumstance , this is just personal experience of kossai . medical and psychiatric systems have uses , and where circumstances safe , not necessarily bad to investigate these avenues .

please do not trust anyone who say that any variation is definite sign of something nonhuman or magical , such as extraterrestrial status - this is not journey which others can decide outcome . this is especially important if not yet investigate medical or psychiatric avenues , or if circumstances of mind or body recently change after medical event , emotional trauma , or other big life event .

under cut for length , and general discussion of frustrations in psychiatric and medical systems .


finch

Jul. 1st, 2025 12:47 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
screenshot from finch - green bird with white dress, white bow, green fairy wings

little bird ! yes , yes ... not very best to really track properly , just want cute things . because shops only have handful any time , can be incentive of save up for next appearance . or . of cheat to fill wallet ! no , no , no , wish that was different . tsk .
~ ?!

active

Jun. 30th, 2025 06:23 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
know what happen , not danger or anything . just pile bad things at once and kind of break , work on stuff for happy .

envisage , think about envisage . usually feel collective form when front , sometimes feel blips of individual , call that envisage . never happen to feel envisage during this before but happen today . feel like , head cover in smoke . purple sparkly magic smoke . know who in front still but feel veil over .

gallery of friends

Jun. 30th, 2025 05:13 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
purple blue faerie colour page
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
swear-y frustrate ahead , need of some tech help , linux .


mushroom musume ~ elati & nelina

Jun. 30th, 2025 01:04 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
was way too hot to play mushroom musume for very long , so instead mostly work on organise obsidian vault for stories . this is ... slow progress and not very fun , but want to hope will become easier to record stories . just sort of wish did this way to start with . >_>
basically , want to record each event - with choices and possibilities - as separate pages from story logs , and then point story logs to those pages with simple blurbs . harder to read through each story cohesively , but easier to actually record during gameplay , and that is important part - and over time , this will result in sort of complete record for possibilities . not really interest in min-max or overanalyse game , want to still enjoy as is , but useful to know which choices carry more or less risk for given character .

anyway ! elati : naturally cultivate into potato , and then gamble to faerie to create looming brown potatoceps . lovely girl .
funnily , elati did also meet girl of dreams , who fellow potato sister nene follow and fall into endless slumber . elati did not follow this far , though , and choose just to sing . also learn how to juggle , meet mr newyear , and discover beauty of snow ! real deal for elati was recluse's debt to witch - have to find and kill lost daughter . fortunately , elati succeed in this , and live to tell tale .

after elati , nelina turn out to be great dusty rose split gill . absolutely adore , and dusty rose is honestly such beautiful palette . nelina make several trips out to abandoned dungeon from dream - come across gnome depot , gift shop , and cavern of art - and as well meet tooth fairy syndicate . by winter , nelina get in touch with these fairies again , and explore mansion . nelina make very good impression with 5 out of 5 successes , and happily begin work for tooth fairy !

on idea of human words

Jun. 29th, 2025 11:35 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
crosspost from tumblr . ( original post )

preface : this is specifically in answer to A. prior ask about animal-centric attitudes in physical nonhuman spaces , which is honestly alterhuman-wide also , and B. new physical nonhuman community , which right now have similar animal-centric lean in language and rules , and want to break down problems with this . will clarify that did also show this to admin , just easier to make things as public post due to how kossai write , so hopefully will see some more change . because of this , there is more mention of physical nonhumans , but still broadly applicable .

person / people is not just human word . many alterhumans and nonhumans still prefer people over terms like animal . not all alterhumanity is nonhuman in nature , not all nonhumanity is animal in nature , and even fellow animal folk can still have preference to acknowledge personhood .

as well , refusal to say person and comparisons to animals can be very touchy subjects for alterhumans who experience any number of oppressions , especially on basis of race . to broadly refer to others as creatures or beasts , even if intend under alterhuman context , is not neutral action .

on top of that , some physical nonhumans naturally belong to humanoid species . this means words for body parts like hands , feet , and nose might still be preferable , and to insist on use animal terms in place is disrespectful . this is not to persuade anyone else to personally accept these words , but not fair to consider these words " human only " .

to set standard of inclusive language for community space , especially in this case physically nonhuman one ... do not focus on which words human and which ones nonhuman , because there will always be exceptions . instead , would be more inclusive to :

  • include words like people in community-wide addresses - such as people and creatures , rather than just creatures . kossai find that addition of folk also can soften implications in these contexts , mileage may vary on this one - creature folk , animal folk , etc .
  • focus on fact that there will be range of users with range of species , and that these users may choose to use any range of words and descriptors .
  • and set standard to follow lead of these users , whether that means whale , cheetah , vampire , or indeed person . to intentionally refuse to call someone as person should be just as punishable as any other intentional refusal to respect terms of choice .

no need to distinguish any of these as human or nonhuman , as that create confusion , frustration , and feelings of isolation even within community .

how curious

Jun. 28th, 2025 10:30 pm
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
know some people talk about hangry feelings - so hungry that just feel irritable and angry - but kossai get more specifically hanal . just really zero in on something that feel in need of organise or fix , but have no energy to actually do so , so instead just temporarily obsess on theory and potential , try to list through pros and cons , basically rubber duck to open air . funny thing is after kossai eat , 90% of time realise that solution was terrible .

anyway so pretty hanal right now .

hopeful respect for others' memories

Jun. 28th, 2025 10:12 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai

crosspost from tumblr .original post )

dreamwidth preface : kossai tumblr audience is largely physical nonhumans , and supporters of physical nonhumans , who can safely navigate exposure to experiences that fall outside modern ideas of objective reality . this post in particular is about language that aim to not trigger unreality by way of question and deny experiences as personal truth .

these points can be useful in cases other than physical nonhumans , such as plural and religious aspects , but please be mindful of this main context if this might trigger .


kossai do not like to approach memories of other folks as false memories , unless that is how individuals personally explain , no matter how far these memories fall outside ideas of objective reality . have some thoughts on language and mindsets to actually put to use in respect .

 

Read more... )

 

kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai

late crosspost from tumblr .original post )

dreamwidth preface : debate whether or not to put this one here - did not write this to reignite discussions , just think important to put these thoughts together cohesively . peak of this discussion was very much frustration for kossai , as feel like people try to justify deliberately hurt friends , and could not explain thoughts very well through that . as well , just write another post which want to cross over here , and that one link to this one , so sort of unavoidable now .


one gripe that still have with discussion of unreality triggers and tags is that ... unreality trigger is not really one solid category . unreality trigger is not only something which contradict ideas of objective reality - this is just one potential kind of unreality trigger . but anything that can cause question and destabilisation of reality is , for all intents and purposes , unreality trigger .

everyone have different experiences , boundaries , and tolerances . to hear of witchcraft and gods might be unreality trigger for one , while denial of these is unreality trigger to another . pool toys could be unreality trigger to someone . so could minecraft . so on and so forth .

kossai have minor unreality triggers that can spiral if already in bad shape - prefer not to say what those triggers would be , internet safety and all , but these pretty silly and innocuous things to others . no one would consider these to contradict ideas of objective reality , but experiences which kossai go through contextualise these as destabilisers .

this is why many physical nonhumans push back against trigger tag experiences as unreality , whether consider experience delusion or not , even if that seem cruel . to reinforce that others consider experiences to be unreal and delusional , and that others do not feel comfortable or safe to hear about experiences , is in fact unreality trigger for these folks .

some folks characterise this as selfish refusal to care for others , when really not . to cross lines of what modern world consider objective reality can and will deeply hurt some , this is true . but everyone who peacefully live beyond those lines not cruel to say that ideas of objective reality and classification as delusion just as much of trigger .

unreality trigger is category as broad as PTSD trigger - these things both sets of mental processes and feelings , which can spur on by any triggers , even ones that contradict common perception of what triggers " should be " .

this is where kossai policy of unreality tags come from . not often come up here anyway - regardless , will tag thought experiments , works of art and fiction , or other posts that deliberately try to play with idea of what is real or not real . but will not tag personal discussions or experiences as unreality .

to draw line of whose experiences get to be reality , and whose experiences must be unreality to hide behind trigger tag , means to decide that only some triggers worth respect - which will hopefully agree , is pretty unfair .

dreams ~ lucid science !

Jun. 27th, 2025 10:34 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
so ... can not remember much detail from this dream , in at least some part because fall asleep again before able to reflect and record .

at some point , kossai pick up coin in this dream , with both text and face inscription . somehow read this text out loud , and realise that what say have no relation to written letters . things get really weird and murky here because try to purposefully change dream environment - after all , know that look around and go through doors both catalysts for change . but this time , nothing happen ! this was probably wrong dream to test that in , because environment was semi-consistent .

what find really curious though : did close eyes several times , which usually wake up out of dreams , whether lucid or not . but this time , did not wake up , just seem to kind of ... return to non-lucidity , because dream continue but no longer seem aware of dream state . 

mushroom musume ~ nene & elati

Jun. 27th, 2025 03:59 am
kossai: masculine form of kossai (Default)
[personal profile] kossai
nene was accelerated pot girl with just right setup of weeds and buds to pretty much guarantee : rooty verdigris potato ! nene have very dreamy life ... no , really . absolutely enamour with girl from dreams , and after death of recluse ( because apparently this recluse was stingy ) just could not think of anyone else to bring to gala . so ... nene meet again , fall truly in love , and decide to live forever in dreams - will never be able to cross over into world of wakefulness again , but will have love by side .

elati was actually , finally , natural potato girl this time ! clean up garden slightly , but manage to stumble and save scum into perfect choices for potato . then , of course , just need to gamble ... ;D yep ! potatoceps is here ! potatoceps is here !!! wahahahahaha !
Page generated Jul. 5th, 2025 07:05 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios